Steve Siebold is a former professional athlete and national coach. Steve conducts speeches and seminars across the United States and Europe on Mental Toughness Training for peak performance. As president of Gove-Siebold Group, Steve and partner Bill Gove have co-authored video and audio album which have been sold in 30 counties and the world. As a 1996 graduate of the Bill Gove Speech Workshop, Steve has become one of the fast rising highest-paid professional speaking in the peak performance arena. He's the author of Mental Toughness Training: The Siebold System.

As great as my coaches were, the people who influenced me the most in the area of mental toughness/performance were my Dad and oldest brother. Outside of Jimmy Connors, my brother Kenny is the single greatest competitor I've ever known - tough as nails and relentless as a collegiate tennis player and wrestler. I watched him as a kid and learned how to compete from his example. My Dad was also a strong competitor, but what he really taught me was how to play hard but lighten up and enjoy the game for the pure fun of it. Again, I learned by watching him do this himself on the tennis court as a kid. As an adult, the person who has impacted me the most is Bill Gove. I've never met a greater champion in my life. Yes, he's the father of professional speaking and the greatest conversational style speaker of all timebut that's not what has influenced me the most. The reason Bill Gove changed my life forever is because of how he lives. He's a man of tremendous energy, yet he takes time for his family and friends. He's a passionate and powerful man, yet he never let his fame and fortune corrupt him. He's helped millions of people all over the world throughout his career, and though he's nearly 90 years old, he continues to reach out to people. If I live to be 150 years old, I will never be able to repay Bill Gove for what he's taught me.

You're totally correct. My mother has had an enormous influence on my life. We spent my entire childhood traveling the country on the national junior tennis circuit. She used to drive an hour to drop me off at practice, drive back an hour to go back to work, and then pick me up at night, 5 days a week. Over 3 hours of driving just so I could get the coaching I needed. How could she not impact me? When I was on top in tennis, she was there with me, and when my career took a nosedive and nobody on the circuit wanted to know me, she was still there. On the national junior circuit many of the players were rich, so they would stay at the Ritz-Carlton or the Hyatt and eat at the fancy restaurants. We would stay at Red Roof or Holiday Inn and eat at the K-Mart grill, just to snub them. It was our way of rebelling against the snootiness of the circuit. We laughed all the time and had a riot traveling together for 12 years. There were ups and downs, wins and losses, laughter and tears. We developed a bond during those years that is unbreakable. I think we earned each other's respect during that period and that respect continues to grow to this day. I feel so blessed just to have had the opportunity to get to know someone as great as my mom. She's the most amazing person I've ever met.

My wife Dawn has impacted me in a completely different way. She grew up on the tougher side of town and didn't have some of the advantages that I had. I met her in college. When I was going to frat parties and having fun, she was working at Burger King and other jobs just to survive and go to school. She was 20 years old, going on 40. She has taught me so much about discipline, hard work and persistence. A few years ago she decided to go into the Real Estate business, and within 2 years she had a mid six-figure income. She did it by working 80-hour weeks and listening to great mentors. Needless to say, she's an amazing woman. We've been married for 14 years and she's the best thing that has ever happened to me. If I were a woman, I would want to be just like her.

I believe it's a three-step process - #1 is to discover your unique talents and abilities, and then connect them with something you love to do. When I was a national tennis coach, I knew that it wasn't enough for me. I had to reach higher if I was going to be truly fulfilled. The hardest thing I've ever done in my life was spend 5 years trying to figure out what I really wanted to do. I was obsessed with finding the answer, yet it still took me over 5 years. Once I decided I was going to teach people the secrets to mental toughness that I had learned as an athlete and coach, I was half way there. The next step was how. That's when I discovered that public speaking was the most powerful position in the world when it comes to influencing large numbers of people. Writing articles, books, audiotapes, videotapes, workbooks, etc. was another way to broadcast the message. Today our programs are sold in over 30 countries around the world.

I knew a lot about my subject because I lived it as an athlete and coach, but I didn't know anything about public speaking. So the second step is to find people who can help you. I realized a long time ago that I wasn't smart enough to get everything I want, so I have always sought out people smarter than me for help. For example, when I became a full-time professional speaker, I opened an office in South Florida, got it fixed up, sat down at my computer and thought: "I need a coach to teach me the ropes."" So I sent an e-mail to the 20 or so past presidents of the National Speakers Association and asked them one simple question: Who is the best speech coach in the world? I sent the e-mail, turned off my computer and went home. The next morning I logged on and my e-mail box was full of responses. The all pointed to Bill Gove, the first president of the National Speakers Association and the father of the industry. It took me more than a month to get a meeting with Bill and get a seat at his famous speech workshop. Once I did, I knew my life would never be the same. I knew I had found the mentor I was looking for.

So my point is find people who can help you. A lot of people talk about the importance of networking, and I think they're right. At the same time, I think the secret is not simple networking, but networking with people who have the power to help you. You have to go to the top people who are in a position of power and do whatever it takes to get their help, even if it means working for free, mowing their lawn, or scrubbing their floor. Find that person and make the decision that he/she will be your mentor, no matter what you have to do to convince them.

The last step is doing whatever it takes to win. This is where the power of loving what you do really kicks in, at least in my mind. When you love what you are doing so much that you would do it for free, it makes you a dangerous competitor in the marketplace. When you're willing to risk everything you have to do what you love, you are virtually in a league by yourself. After I attended Bill Gove's 2-day private workshop, I knew I was going to make it in the speaking business. I didn't know how long it was going to take, and quite frankly I had no idea how difficult this business was, but I knew I would make it eventually because I would never quit. I told Bill I would do everything he told me to do and I would follow his instructions to the letter. When Bill Gove says "jump", I say "how high?"

Bill told me to spend 2 years on the rubber chicken circuit speaking for free. I believe I hold the all-time rubber chicken record for speaking at more Kiwanis and Rotary breakfasts, lunches and dinners in the state of Florida than anyone in history! Bill did the same thing on advice from his mentor Dr. Ken McFarland in the 1940's, all across Minnesota. I followed Bill all over the country watching him and listening to every word he told me. That help allowed me to earn six figures my second year in the business, and it just keeps getting better and better.

Here's the most important piece of this puzzle in my humble opinion: For me, this is it. This is the business that I will make my home for the rest of my life, no matter what it takes. If I lost everything I have tomorrow, and I was living under a bridge in a cardboard box, the first thing I would do is begin planning my comeback. When you love it so much that you're willing to stake everything you have on one turn of the wheel, the universe seems to say "Let him through, he'll never give up, so just let him through." After all, you can't stop a man who won't be stoppedyou can't beat a man who won't be beat. That's when you become a powerhouse and you get on the road to turning your dreams into reality. I'm not sure it's a magic formula, but if there is one, that's it in my book.

I think Network marketing is the most brilliant form of marketing ever created. It's pure genius. Period. Anyone who doesn't see that doesn't understand it in my opinion. Yesterday I received an invitation to attend a private party for Rich Devos, cofounder of Amway. Mr. Devos not only brought us Amway, but I see him as the father of the networking industry. I'm not a big party person but I'm going to this one just to speak with him. Whether you are an Amway fan or not, the truth is if it weren't for the "big A", this industry probably would not exist. They were the pioneers. As a matter of fact, before Amway, when Rich Devos and Jay Van Andel were Nutrilite distributors, guess whom Nutrilite hired to speak at their convention? You guessed it, Bill Gove. This was back in the 1940's, and Bill and Rich remain friends to this day. Sorry, I got off the subjectgetting back to network marketingI love the business because the whole industry revolves around personal development. The entire premise is based on the idea that I will attract people who are like me, so I better be the best me I can be. So distributors listen to tapes, read books, go to seminars and anything else that will help them grow both personally and professionally.

The industry is full of people who are trying to be the best they can be so they can have what they want. How can anyone argue with that? These people are heroes to me. They are sometimes ridiculed and attacked by people who don't understand the business, or who have been taken advantage of by distributors abusing the system. Yet many of these people hang tough because they believe in the dream they have for themselves and their family. They are the great business warriors of our time. They take hit after hit, and they continue to fight. They go into this business knowing that the odds are against them but they are willing to risk it anyway. How can you not respect them? It's easy to have a big title like Dr. or President or CEObut networkers can't hide behind titles. They are totally exposed to every fruitcake that wants to take a cheap shot at them, and I think it takes a lot of guts to put yourself in that position. That's why I love helping them. I want every one of them to win and get what they want, and I think they feel that. I want to help them fight the good fight. Anything I can do for these people I will do. There's not a group of people as mentally tough in any other industry. I'll put our networking Tiger group up against anybody. As a matter of fact, if war ever breaks out in the streets of America, I want the Tigers on my team. They are as tough as they come.

The hardest decision that Bill and I had to make was to be speakers and trainers for the industry, or to choose a company and become full-time distributors. The marketing plan in networking is far superior to the speaking business. It's not even close. We eventually decided to be vendors to the industry so we could do the thing we both love the most: Speaking and training people based on what has helped us succeed in our lives. I feel privileged to be involved with this industry. It is made up of the nicest, most sincere people on the planetand I plan on spending the rest of my life with these people.

Decide what you want and put it down on paper as soon as possible. Just pick one thing at a time. If you start chasing two goals, you're going to water down your efforts. Once you accomplish the first goal, you can move on to the next one. Once you decide what you are after, write it down on paper. There's something magical about writing it down. Brian Tracy tells me that all geniuses think on paper. Next, create a vision using the movie screen of your mind. Put images to your words and lock your dream into a tangible vision. Rehearse this vision every day in your mind for 3-5 minutes. Feel the emotion when you see the pictures in your mind. Talk about it with people you care about. Write affirmations that build the belief in your vision, and say them out loud everyday. And the last step is to go to work to make it happen. Decide that you will have the vision or you will die trying. Decide that no one will stop you - not even yourself. Convince yourself that your entire life has been a preparation for this very moment, and that achieving this goal is your destiny. It's your birthright.

Think about your goal all the time. Dream about it at night. Listen to tapes by successful people. I listen to a minimum of 5 personal development tapes per week, every single week of the year. I've been doing this since 1985 and I've learned more from tapes than I did in college. Read books. Not fiction books, but success books like Think & Grow Rich. Read biographies of successful people and use their ideas. Watch who you associate with on a weekly basis. The people around you will influence you. Hang around successful people who are going somewhere. If your friends are not positive and supportive of you and your dreams, go out and find different friends. You don't have to dump your old buddies, but at the same time you need more positive influences. I'll give you an example. I have a friend named John Spannuth. You might recognize the name. John Spannuth was the man responsible for creating adult Special Olympics with the help of the Kennedy family. He also created the Masters Swimming Program and many other very successful ventures. Every time I call John he is congratulating me on my success and asking me questions like, " What's next? Do you think that you are thinking big enough? Who do you know that can help you achieve this goal? Are you taking time with your family while you are working all of these hours?" The list goes on and on. How can I lose with a friend like this? He's always pushing me to reach higher and be better, and I can't begin to tell you how much that has helped me. Seek out these kinds of people

With this kind of intensity, you have a great shot of living your vision. There are no guarantees, but you have a legitimate shot at the big time. Most people don't because they fail to do these basic things. They have a better chance hitting the lotto than they do getting what they want. Don't be like them. Be like the Tiger!

If I can do it, so can you.

Steve Siebold
c/o GoveSiebold Group Inc.
2240 Woolbright Rd. Suite 413
Boynton Beach, Florida 33426
USA.
Phone: 561-733-9078
Fax: 561-733-7595
E-mail: steve@govesiebold.com